"I let my fingers do the walking"

I am going to make a checklist. Not to be used as a list of requirements, more a guideline. Something to make me think about the decisions that I make. For instance, some things will do nothing more then make me think, "Will you feel the same way about that little thing in 6 months?"

1. Smart.
2. Good sense of humor.
3. Fit. (Similar interests in regard to care of self)
4. Attractive to me. (Personality is NOT everything...::coughtaracough::)
5. Gains the approval of my friends. (MUST make it through the Grizz, then Nitsirk before "serious" status can be recieved)

To be continued...

"Have you ever looked fear in the face..."

There is something about me that I do not understand. Its this whole glutton for punishment thing. I don't want to be broken anymore, but I don't know how to put myself back together. I feel like I have been loosing pieces all along the way, and there is no way for me to find them all and put them back. And even if there were some way, how do I keep them together?

I thrive on all of the things that break me.


Maybe I should write my story. Years back, in counceling, I was asked to write out the thing that got me into counceling to begin with. I couldn't do it.